When young couples are dating
they are, to a greater or lesser degree, kind, thoughtful, respectful, and
romantic. Through words and actions, they build one another's confidence and
esteem. There is a reason for this - They are courting one another, each trying
to win the other's affection. But once the wedding ceremony and honeymoon is
over, many couples begin to pack up all the materials of courtship and put them
away, as though courtship were a child's game, never to be played again.
They put away the game called "Romance and
Courtship"; but many couples begin to play another game called
"Assassinate the Spouse". I have observed many people playing this
game. It must be very popular. Actually, anyone can play this destructive game.
The only rule is that you must be married. The objective of the game is very
simple: each contestant attempts to humiliate, embarrass, and ridicule his or
her mate in front of their friends. I am sure you have seen people playing this
game. You may have even engaged in it yourself? Both men and women have a
uncanny knack for it. Although you can play in private, the damage inflicted is
much more destructive when other people are around. And if you want to be
especially cruel and vicious, you will be sure to let everyone know that your
husband or wife is dumb, ugly, and lazy. Those are the three areas where most of
us are especially vulnerable. Bonus points are awarded for the woman who can
cause her husband to leave the room in shame, or the man who can reduce his
wife to tears. THIS BRUTAL GAME HAS NO WINNERS. The contest is over when
one person has totally destroyed the self-respect and dignity of the other,
making him or her feel completely worthless as a human being, much less a
husband or wife.
Personally, I prefer the game of "Romance and Courtship". It is much more pleasant to observe and to participate in that one. It is the same game you played in your youth; but as an adult you take it
more seriously. Its rules are
very simple: "Let everyone of you in particular so love his wife...and the
wife see that she reverence her husband."